Dear one, it is in the moments where fear and worry are so accessible that it is the most medicinal to access the part of you that lives in Surrendered Based Trust.
Surrendered Based Trust: My deep trust in exactly What Is, right now. My trust in whatever the Universe lays in front of me, no matter how different that path is then the plan I had once formed. My unwavering trust in this moment, this experience, this challenge, this opportunity, this feeling.
Surrendered Based Trust is about releasing my attachment to the idea that I know how things “should” be, or that I need to know why anything is happening.
I trust what is happening simply because it is here, right now. This is Surrendered Based Trust.
My journey to cultivating such a deep, unwavering trust in the moment began many months ago: I was on the island of Maui, by myself and me and my partner were experiencing very painful challenges in our relationship. Being so far away from him was so hard, and I found myself experiencing waves of anxiety as I tried to manage the situation, according to what I thought was “the right thing” (us staying together).
What I learned on Maui is that the moment I choose to surrender to what is happening, and release all ideas of how I think anything “should be”, I immediately feel lighter and less anxious in my body.
A comforting peace comes over my system, as I come to accept the current situation as it is. Rather than using my energy to ask the Universe why? or how?, I simply feel the truth of the moment and allow my body to express the emotions that come with that recognition.
Allowing emotions to move through my body as they come up is a path of surrender. Fighting my emotions (because it’s not what I want to be feeling) is foraging down the path of resistance.
Just months ago, I had another powerful experience that asked me to cultivate Surrendered Based Trust. When one day, I felt in my gut that it was time for me and my partner of three years to separate.
The separation that followed was the most open hearted and loving relational transition I’ve ever experienced. Had I put my energy and focus towards resisting the truth I felt in my body, asking questions like but why is this happening or how can we fix this, we would not have separated with such grace and abundant love for one another.
Surrendered Based Trust is not about having all the answers to the questions I want to have answers to. This desire comes from a place of wanting to feel like I am in control of the situation.
Which I know I am not.
That graceful separation led me to a solo journey across the world, just in time for the coronavirus epidemic to affect the entire planet in a way we’ve never experienced in our lifetimes.
And in this time of great fear and worry, I am so grateful I have Surrendered Based Trust rooted deeply into my system,
Surrendered Based Trust acknowledges that every single experience in my life is happening for me, even if I can’t understand the how right now. When in practice, I can find peace amongst a chaotic storm because deep down I know there is nothing to fear.
This is happening, so it’s happening for me(us).
Days ago, I couldn’t begin to understand how this world wide epidemic was here to help, but I trusted that it was. I continue to wake up each day and pray, singing songs of Gratitude for the vibrant blue sky and the sounds of the birds singing.
I believe Surrendered Based Trust is an avenue to more grace, less resistance and a greater opening of the heart. Not just when things are going my way, or according to my plan. Rather, in any situation, challenging or otherwise (which is often when graceful openness is most needed).
Today as I write this, the positive benefits of this epidemic are becoming more clear.
And I feel peace in my entire body, as I have since the beginning. When an emotion emerges, I let myself express that feeling through emotional expression, dance, movement, breath, sound or other avenues of transmutation.
And even in the depths of my tears, I never waver in my trust.
For me, this Surrendered Based Trust is medicine. And allows me to access gratitude & simultaneously stay open to the grace of the Universe, even in the most painful and devastating of times.